Dialogue Exersise

Hello again, :)

I love my characters. I could spend hours in their heads, nurturing their motivations, personalities, and quirks. But when I reread the dialogue, something seems off. Everything seemed so perfect in my head. Yet on paper, their long whinnied questions and explanations seem fake.

While I was on a road trip with my cousin, he shared a game with me his English teacher had taught him. The game ate hours off our trip. Anyone with a great imagination and a friend can play. 

All you need is a pen and paper.

The Rules:

1. Both of you pick a character. It can be a celebrity, or a superhero, or your own creation.

2. Pick a location or a scenario, like a coffee shop or an amusement park.

3. Take turns writing dialogue (don't peek until the other person is done with their turn). 

The game is a lot like role playing.

Here is a sample of what my cousin and I wrote. See if you can pick up on the character's personalities.

Location: Coffee Shop

Characters: 

Flare-me

 Sam-my cousin

Sam: I love coffee with a flaring passion. Get it?

Flare: Hmmph

Sam: You don't like coffee? It's like an American addiction, isn't it?

Flare: I'm Japanese

Sam: Oh...well, do you not like coffee? Why are you here then? I mean, this isn't the best coffee shop, but I do like it, especially the frappe. My goodness, the mint is strong...woah!

Flare: Your drinking caffeine?

Sam: It's decaf...

Flare: Wait...Why is this cafe empty?

Sam: I dunno, maybe that guy can tell us.

Suddenly a dark silhouette of a man wearing a large hat and a trench coat burst through the cafe entrance.

Flare: Sam, down!

We wrote more, but I think you get the idea. The advantage to this game is having someone else react to everything you say. Each person is trying to guess what will happen next and move the story forward through their character's actions.

Why not try it? Was the dialogue any different? Did you get any character insight?

My Kind of Mermaid

My little mermaid

She whispers of land
My sweet mermaid
Reefs glow by her hand

Adorned with pearls
Her soft hair is never cut
Her gaze flows like the current
Yet her ears stay shut

Lucky little mermaid
Singing "Why must I have gills?"
Naive hopeless mermaid
Shallow coasts never fill

My kind of mermaid
Swims deeper with care
My brave mermaid
Searches for truth not air

 Under the water pressure
Her strong bones never break

Her scales lock like chainmail
Beauty no longer fake

My kind of mermaid 
Find what Land doesn't know
My growing mermaid
Love absent truth is shallow

Rewritten Fable

This is an easy exercise most people probably learn in their English class. But I still enjoy the game. 

Just pick one of Aesop's Fables and an author. Then rewrite the Fable in that author's style.

I chose Charles Dickens. His narration is far more conversational. His work is well decorated with adverbs and adjectives--sometimes three in a row. His style was a little easier to emulate since mine is similar.  

The Fox and the Grapes

Charles Dickens Style

            It was a pleasant day. One in which someone might have a picnic or wander about enjoying the fresh air. I'm not sure which one the fox was doing but it hardly matters. Whatever the case, the birds were singing, the sun was shining, and a clump of grapes were hanging from a vine—content in it's state of being. It was on this wonderful day that the fox caught a glimpse of the juicy grapes hanging high over his head. Oh! How he wanted those grapes. The fox stared longingly at them, licking his lips, scheming the best plan that might reward him with what he most desired. The branch that held the grapes was to weak to hold his weight and he did not wish to request help for fear of the obligation to share.

            That left him with only one option. With all his might he leaped up to the grapes and snapped his jaw shut when he reached maximum height. But the determined fox was rewarded with nothing but a mouthful of air. The fox eyed the grapes with suspicion and tried again with the same result. Up and down the fox went putting all his energy into a goal that was so close he could barely touch with his nose and yet so far away. With each jump the fox convinced himself he was getting closer and could picture himself in triumph with the cluster of grapes in his jaw. 

            All day the fox leaped and bounded and reached for the taunting grapes until the sun was low.  The fox, depleted of all energy and incentive, fell on his face in exhaustion and surrendered.

             He sourly groaned, “What a waste. I should never had tried to jump so high; I'm sure those grapes were sour anyway.”

Have you ever done this exercise before? What was the result? Did a little bit of your own style creep in anyway?

The Riddle of the Maiden in White

Face of beauty, heart of cold

Silken hair, a lust for gold

The princess of Halvendale 

So beautiful and fair

Was taken from her people

By a dragon in the air

Captive in its lair she'll wait

For a knight to change her fate

For months, she prays

But cursed she stays

For if not soon, too little too late

Knights, warriors from many lands

Come to slay dragon with their hands

They hope to be rewarded

 by tales of their might

And win the hand and heart 

of the Maiden in White

But this prize, not theirs to claim

And many will die by dragon's flame

For her betrothed only has the power to see

That the Dragon of Halvendale 

is not what she seems.

Beyond Yourself

To kick off this blog, allow me to share this with you.

"...growth comes only through contact with what is larger and greater than one's self. Something to stretch the mind and give direction to the imagination..." Ethel Herr,  An Introduction to Christian Writing, pg 74-75.

     This quote is from an older book, but that makes it no less true. 

What you find beyond yourself will baffle you.

Greetings

Thank you for giving me a chance.

Let me be frank, I don't know what I'm doing. 
Keeping that in mind, take my advice with a grain of salt.
 Feel free to give me constructive criticism.

     For as long as I can remember, I've wanted to write stories, but school and work got in the way. I'm graduating soon, so I decided, why not start taking my dream seriously? If anything thing comes out of this, I hope to become a better writer and maybe make your day. I plan to post once or twice a week at first. After I get more comfortable, I might post more often.

       I'll post some excerpts of my work, maybe some comic strips, drawings, or tips about world building. I may also share some scripture verses, hymns, song lyrics, books or articles that speak to me. My main focus will be faith and fiction, more specifically fantasy and superheroes.

  I hope my blog brings you encouragement and snippets of inspiration.